Sweet 60!

What does 60 mean to you. The fact that each unforgiving minute is full of 60 long seconds and each eternal hour is pieced together by 60 unforgiving minutes notwithstanding, the fact remains that 60 is one of the most unglamorous numbers.

They decided that 50 is a half century and 100 makes you a hero. 60? Who cares for 60. The worst thing is, you retire at 60, making it one of the most dreaded number. Suddenly a virile man becomes old and irritable, or worse, irritating. A sultry aunty becomes a sulking grandma. Shit.

Do you think a song called Summer of 60 would have become famous. Guess not. And pray tell me what position can be called the 60 position, it would lead to nothing but boregasm!

However, as a friend said..."It reminds me of my morning TEA AT SIX" made me recall that every cloud has a silver lining.

When my Dad went to convince his dad that it was ok for a Bihari Rajput to marry a Bengali kayasta...he borrowed 240Rs from his friend...it was 4 months worth of his savings from, guess what, his earnings from tuitions of the princely sum of, yes sir, Rs.60! But for those 60 priceless rupees earned each month for four months, where would I be? A nameless, faceless, tadpole shaped, unicellular, uninteresting equivalent of space junk!

When Onion sold for 60...Governments fell!

Guess what people mean when they say make it large? Yup 60ml.

You know what they call a unhealthy collaboration in hindi... ६०-गाँठ!

You know the angles of a equilateral triangle...well they are of 60 degrees each and you superimpose two of these, it becomes...Star of David...the union of male and female...Yin and Yang! Don't underestimate mate!

My next post...number 2...when you fail to succeed...

Chin Up!

कश्तियाँ तूफ़ान से डरतीं तो लहरों का आलिंगन कहाँ करतीं ।
ज़िन्दगी किनारों पे बैठ कर नहीं जिया करते ।
गर सांस का आना ज़िन्दगी है तो सांस का जाना भी ज़िन्दगी है ।
फेफड़ों में भरके हवा होंठ नहीं सिया करते ।
लौ अगर जली ही नहीं कि जल जाऊँगी, तो उसकी किस्मत में बस अँधेरा है ।
बुझे बुझे से दिये रौशनी नहीं दिया करते ।
धूप से डरता है तू तो उजाला क्या देखेगा ।
धूप के बिना तो पेड़ छाओं भी नहीं किया करते ।

Cyclic Reference - Much Ado About Nothing

The pullup ring that hangs down from the jackfruit tree still exists,though the rope is frayed,

The koel still sings atop the neem tree, all she needs to say is already said.

The drumsticks in season still flowers,

And the pomegranate falls in that well of ours.

Sparrows sometimes still fall in the well, no one drops a bucket to pull them out,

Poor souls thrash and gulp and drown, can't for help even shout.

Guava Rots and falls amidst thunder showers,

And chickens lay egg in that backyard of ours!

Friends walk past, don't even glance for fear,

They just might see some ghosts of those past years,

They bow their heads and walk past those flowers,

That still bud, in those rose bushes of ours.

Must move on, time can't stay...

Memories fade and hair turns gray.

Must learn to live life by the hour,

And fake it in our Ivory Towers!

IF - रुडयार्ड किपलिंग की यादगार कविता

अगर सर अपना रख सको ऊँचा
जब सभी के सर नीचे हो और वजह तुम हो ये कहें,
जब खुद पे कर सको भरोसा उनके शक के दर्मेयाँ
और पूछ सको उनसे उनके शक की वजह भी।
जब कर सको इंतज़ार बिना थके, बिना रुके,
झूठ को जब तुम सच न बनाओ, और नफरत तुम्हारी फितरत न हो,
जब तुम ज़रुरत से ज्यादा न बनो, न दिखो। ।

जब तुम देखो सपने, पर उनमे खो न जाओ
जब तुम सोचो पर तुम्हारी सोच ही न मंजिल हो तुम्हारी,
जब सफलता और असफलता दोनों ही एक से लगे
और तुम्हारे सच का झूठ बनते देख सको तुम,
जब तुम्हारा पूरा जीवन तुम्हारे आगे बिखर जाये
और फिर टूटे हुए औजारों से उसे जोर सको तुम। ।

अगर अपनी तमाम ज़िन्दगी को जुए की तरह हार सको
और फिर से कर सको सुरुआत उसकी,
बिना कुछ कहे, कुछ सोचे।
और बेजान जिस्म को कह सको की थोडा और रुक के अभी
काम और भी हैं ज़माने में करने के लिए। ।

अगर भीड़ में भी उतने ही तुम तुम हो
और रजवारों में भी तुम तुम हो,
अगर न दोस्त, न दुश्मन तुम्हे हरा सकें
और हर इंसान तुम्हारा हो पर ज्यादा नहीं,
अगर हर मिनट में तुम रख सको लम्हों का हिसाब
दुनिया ये तुम्हारी है और तुम
हो गए हो बड़े मेरे बेटे । ।

क्या मंदिर है, क्या मस्जिद है.

मन ही गीता , मन ही बाइबल, मन मेरा कुरान,
गुरु ग्रन्थ साहिब मन है मेरा, मन ही वेद पुराण।
मन ही गिरिजा, मन गुरुद्वारा, मन में राम विराजे हैं,
मंदिर मस्ज़िद गुरूद्वारे सब, उसके ही दरवाज़े हैं।

आरती गाओ, नमाज़ पढो तुम, सुन लो तुम अज़ान
हिंदू हो तुम, या हो मुस्लिम, मिल जायेंगे भगवान।
मन की पूजा ही असली पूजा, मन में राम विराजे हैं,
मंदिर मस्ज़िद गुरूद्वारे सब, उसके ही दरवाज़े हैं।

अल्लाह है वो, जीजस वो, वो ही किसन कन्हैया है,
ढाई हाथ ज़मीं क्या उसको, जो इस जग के ही रचैया हैं।
मन से मन का मेल करो तुम, मन में राम विराजे हैं,
मंदिर मस्ज़िद गुरूद्वारे सब, उसके ही दरवाज़े है।

पशु पवन और हर बच्चे बेलों में, कबसे बसते हैं भगवान,
फिर पत्थर की मूरत में जाने क्या, खोज रहा इंसान।
मन में मुरख बसा तू इनको, इनमे राम विराजे हैं,
मंदिर मस्ज़िद गुरूद्वारे सब, उसके ही दरवाज़े है।

बरसात की एक रात

जम कर बरसी व्याकुल बरसात
और भिगो गयी तन को भी, मन को भी
अँधेरी अनोखी अजब सी ये रात
भीगती रही और हंसती रही।
तारे दिखे नहीं तो क्या
चाँद नज़र न आया, न सही
और भी बेहतर कुछ मिल गया
ऐसा भी होता है कभी,कभी।
कुछ हम भीगे, कुछ तुम भीगी
कुछ भींग गया आसमान
यूँ ही भीगने, भागने में
बरस गए कई अरमान।
बस यूँ ही ये बदल बरसते रहे
यूँ ही तो होती रहे बरसात
कुछ तुम कहो, कुछ हम कहे
और कभी न बीते ये अनोखी रात।

Who moved my Curd Rice

Ok. I know.

The title of this post is deceptively similar to a Best Seller Self Help Book. Disclaimer: The similarly is purely coincidental and not an attempt to fleece the popularity of that book.

It's not one of my seven habits to write lift offs. Come to think of it, its not even my bathrobe.

So, is this one of those cookery blogs...not really...its not even Chicken soup for the Soul...

To write a Cookery blog, after all would be a recipe for disaster.

So, what is this blog about?

Frankly, it's an ode to mediocrity. It's all about "Forget, Who Moved my Cheese...Who allowed me to get some cheese in the first place.!"..I was so happy with my Curd Rice...it goes well with Mango Pickle...it's difficult to move...both little people and little mice can't move it...and no one can move the big people...which is what the result is, if you have enough of curd rice!

So, who moved my curd rice!!!

Once upon a time...there was a Baba...not Baba Sehgal...although he was there too...this was one of them real things...those who teach Strip Yoga and Tantric Sex to middle aged foreigners. This one was the Before Specimen of Before and After adverts for Waxing Strips. Where there is a Baba...there is a baby (No..I think I got that one wrong...I think that one goes something like where there is a Bill there is a Monica...Aw! forget it...I am mixing these things...someone get my Cigar.)

So this Baba...he decided to write a book - It's actually quite simple to attain babadom...you begin with Tantric Sex...move on to an Ashram of your own (any order is fine...just don't forget the Sex)..get a fan following...write a book...get an exclusive MMS of your own...and voila...you are now a Baba. You should either be a Baba...or you should be Paris Hilton. All other Professions are for losers. Where is the curd rice - you must be thinking. Rightly. You see, there is no Curd Rice. There wasn't meant to be. Curd Rice was a metaphor.

Metaphors are the next big thing. Discovering new Metaphors is something like discovering the diamond in you.

Come to think of it, unless your mom was a rich babe...I doubt very much they will find a diamond inside of you. Not too many people can shit diamonds, it takes real guts to do so...pun purely by accident.

Well, this Baba...like all other Baba's, wanted to write a book. Like typical Baba books, this one was about discovering your inner voice. It talked off, among other things...writing the script for your inner voice...listening to the positive energy flowing through your inner voice. Really, if you spend too much time talking to your inner self, you'll end up in one of those Nursing homes for the rich. The ones where they give you enaemas if you get a headache.

To be continued...

एक सड़क की कहानी

निकले थे इक राह में हम
ये सोच कर सामने मंजिल है
कुछ और चले तो पता चला
के रास्ता ही मंजिल है।

कुछ दूर तक अँधेरा है
कुछ और राह ये बोझिल है
बढे चलो तुम बढे चलो
आगे सड़क ये झिलमिल है।

रुको नहीं, मत ये सोचो
हमे यहाँ क्या हासिल है
चले चलो, तुम चले चलो
यहाँ कदम कदम एक मंजिल है।

अगर मिले कहीं दोराहे,
कोई एक राह पकड़ लेना
इस राह भी कोई मंजिल है
उस राह भी कोई मंजिल है।

अगर लगे एकाकी मन
और समझ न आये क्या करें
कुछ दोस्त तुम बना लेना
दोस्त यहाँ बड़े अच्छे है, दोस्त यहाँ दरियादिल हैं।

Musings of a Bookworm

आज भी जब मिलते हैं पुराने दोस्तों से
बहुतों से नहीं मिलते, न बहुत बार मिलते हैं
कहते हैं सब वही पुरानी बात हमसे
"क्या आज भी तुम रहते हो किताबों में आँखें गोते"
और हम कहतें हैं उनसे, अपने ही अन्दाज ये बयां में
वक्त के बीतने में, गुजरने में लम्हे
वक्त के बिखरने में, बिगढ़ने में लम्हे
हमेशा, हर जगह, एक से कहाँ होते?

मेज़ पर रखी उस पुरानी किताब के पन्ने
कभी खामोश होते हैं, कभी गर्म हवा में फरफराते हैं
कहते हैं हैं कभी दबी दबी जुबां से हमसे
आजकल क्यूँ नहीं अपनी छाती से हमे लगा के सोते
क्यूँ तुम लैपटॉप के पन्ने में अपनी
तक़दीर खोजते हुए, कभी टटोलते हुए
ज़िन्दगी कों माय दोकुमेंट्स के फोल्डर में फाइल करके
हुए जा रहे हो बस होते होते!

छह महीने से बुकशेल्फ मे एन्चंत्रेस ऑफ़ फ्लोरेंस
नयी नवेली दुल्हन सी बेचैन है अपने सुहागरात के लिए
कभी कुछ भी तो नहीं कहती, फिर भी
याद करते हैं उसे हम सोते सोते
कुछ किताबें ऐसी भी हैं जिनको पढ़ा है कुछ बाहर से
जिनके बारे मे न तो अनजान हैं न कुछ जानते हैं
न बेखबर है जिनसे, न पहचानते हैं
जो बस रह गयी बंद, शुरू होते होते !

कुछ किताबें तो ऐसी भी हैं, मन के किसी कोने मे बंद
जो लिखी ही नहीं, बस रह गयीं एक ख्याल बन कर,
इनके भी फसल लगाने के, काटने के लिए
कुछ नन्हे नन्हे से बीज होते, बीज होते, बीज होते!

Bangalore to Kanyakumari Via Madurai and Rameshwaram

It has taken me a while to get back to writing. Actually, it has taken me a while to get back to Life itself after having my share of chasing the mundane.

The folks were in and wanted to take a train or a Bus to Kanyakumari from Bangalore -not exactly my idea of a fun Vacation -so suggested that I tag along as the designated Driver and we do this leisurely on the Swift! Boss was sweet (Writing this line as it is the Annual Review Season) and granted Leave pronto.

As these things go, scheduled a routine service for my Car and the day of service it got buggered by a bike and ended up with a proper maintenance schedule of a Week with 3 days to go for the Trip! Did not want to do this trip on a Alto-Lets go with 4 Adults and 1 hyperactive Kid so exchanged it with Ajay's Swift (TN Registration was an additional boon since it meant that one would not get too noticed while one drove down TN Roads!) and the Car held good (After a 9 Point Service and Nitrogen in the Wheels) for all of 1760Kms although the fuel efficiency could have been better!

The Drive started off well on Sunday the 25th April, we started early (about 8.00am) and hit a relatively free NH7 beyond Hosur - We carried our own Lunch so did not really have a lengthy stopover anywhere except to have lunch by the way side (Had a Large Ice Bag so there was no dearth of Supply of Chilled Butter Milk for most part of the day!)

We hit Madurai around 2PM (435Kms in 6 Hrs with a stopover of about an Hour is not such a bad thing!) and checked into Hotel Tamil Nadu - Madurai I (Old Properly but very clean and very neat and Value for Money for a Twin Bedded A/C Room with Separate Dressing Room at Rs1000/Night! - Was our acco of choice at all stopovers wherever rooms were available. You Can book online at http://www.ttdconline.com/) - We spent the evening at Meenakshi Temple and I alone spent the night at the TTDC Bar with a Rum and Coke!

26th Morning saw us head for Rameshwaram and enroute we changed plans to come back for the night to Madurai and instead decided to stay back at Rameshwaram - at hindsight a good decision - Rashmi booked the Hotel at Rameshwaram - Non TTDC as it was not available since we planned our trip and one of the reasons for the original decision to head back to Madurai instead of staying over at Rameshwaram. Rashmi also managed to get TTDC to postpone our 26th Stay at Madurai to 29th (for our return journey)

Rameshwaram was great especially Pamban Bridge which connects the mainland to the Island. The place is falling apart due to neglect but retains its original Temple Town charm.

Performed Pooja at the Ramanathswamy temple on 27th before heading off to Kanyakumari. Realised that there was a Bandh Call by the Left, so decided to stick to the National Highway rather than take the smaller State Highways and connecting roads. This meant coming all trhe way back to Madurai on NH 49B (Two Lane-but road in excellent condition and rejoining NH7 from there on, possibly an additional 50 Kms, but worth not taking a risk). Still managed to hit Kanyakumari at 3PM (Started from Rameshwaram at 1o:30am and travelled a total of 405Kms.). NOT.BAD.AT.ALL.

TTDC Hotel Tamil Nadu Kanyakumari was more...much...much...more than what I expected. Two Double Rooms for Two nights at Rs.4080 Plus Taxes gave you a Beach front property where Peacocks (in the plural and wild ones!) strolled on the Lawns. The Bar stocked Old Monk at 50 bucks a Large! The Restaurant served Indian, Chinees and Tanthoori Food - Good Food spelling notwithstanding!

The Heat was killing although Vivekananda Rock Memorial and Thiruvaluvar statue were great. The Sunrise was a dampener due to over cast conditions, but still got a good picture!

Also discovered the Suchinram Temple (The only temple of its kind where Bramha,Vishnu and Mahesh are worshipped together as a Trinity and presumably the place where Indra got salvation after doing the deed with Ahilya, hence the name Suchindram!). It's here that we found a place selling Barotta (Sounds like Beretta!) and Boori Masal (I know it sounds like a very hot and very well known place but roughly translates into Poori-Sabji!)

The Drive Back from Kanyakumari was a relaxed one, we took our time to start and reached Madurai only at 5PM. Checked into Hotel Tamil Nadu Madurai Unit II (A Star property, no less although the rate remains reasonable at 1200+Tax for a Double A/C Room. It was here that I also realised that since we managed to continuously stay at 3 Hotel Tamil Nadu's at a Stretch, we had a 15% discount due to us! (Pocketed a cool 1272/- which meant that Petrol for the Journey Back was now Free!). The Bar (Bar-Bar for me on this Trip, as you've noticed by now!) was as good as ever although costlier in terms of 65 Bucks for a large Old Monk!

Basically did nothing but sleep on this trip to Madurai, although did manage to catch up with the beautiful Thirumalai Naick Palace the next day before heading back to Bangalore.

Reached Bangalore at around 5.30pm on 30th April and headed straight for the Balcony to check on my 24 Potted plants (All survived, partly due to heavy watering and Plastic covers placed around the roots before we started our Journey!) and Buckets of Water flowed!

The body gave up around 7PM and stayed that way till 1PM the next day (A Good Massage at Ojus between 11 and 1 cured me!)

Will add details as I remember them. You can catch up on the Photos on my Facebook profile, till I figure out a fast way to load a slideshow here.

Hope you enjoyed reading this account.